Circus performers in Brisbane are outraged after an Australian official told them (allegedly) to shave off their beards and put sunscreen on. The reason? Their beards may offend local blokes.
Sheila Might and Cheryl Wood said they were just trying to make a living working as bearded ladies in the circus. They originally grew their beards for natural sun protection. They wanted to keep their skin looking young, but obviously never considered that they look like Chimps arses. Ms Might claimed that beards were a much better protection from the sun as they are chemical free, unless you have shampooed it recently. ‘We’re in our own country so we should be able to do whatever we like.’
Ms Wood chimed in and told The Ballyeffin Beacon, ‘ It’s bloody discrimination’. The ladies were snavelled up by the circus because of their natural fugliness, and their incredible knack of attracting a crowd.
Another bearded performer, May B Knightly, did oblige the official and shaved her beard clean off. She has since been hospitalised with a severe rash, caused, apparently, by a popular brand of sunscreen. The manufacturer of the said sunscreen immediately declined to comment. But then released a short statement saying that they don’t give a f#@k.
Another statement, one released by the council, stated:
‘As such, our officer apologised for being a c#@t and advised the rest of them yokes that they could carry on bearded.’
A recording has subsequently emerged of the official asking the bearded ladies for a root. They (apparently) spurned his advances so there began this controversy.
As soon as we get our hands on the recording we will bring it to you (Ed).