I don’t want to be a visitor to a website that would have me as a visitor. Feel the same? Don’t let the door hit you on your arse on the way out…

FREE Adventure in Ireland

Join the 100Km Walk Challenge. FREE Adventure Hike in Ireland

FREE Adventure in Ireland

Are you looking for a bit of excitement? A whole load of excitement even? Feeling a bit fatty? Lethargic? Are you up for a challenge? I bet you are……

FREE Adventure Activity on Ballyeffin Beacon. Adventure Ireland.
What could the Adventure be?

You might be bored, or just plain knackered, or maybe you are in a rut and you need a bit of a boost. Well you’ve come to the right place to beat them downers and get back up. With our FREE 100 Kilometer Challenge you will be winning all the way. You’ll get a real pep in your step. Air into your lungs. Colour into your face as you get that blood circulating round the big-old body.

Great Adventures in Ireland with The Ballyeffin Beacon.
So many adventures. I'm excited.

The FREE 100KM Challenge, proudly sponsored by The Ballyeffin Beacon, will get you pumped. But that’s not all. Yes! There is more. You will also sweat out all that shite that has accumulated in your system while you have been lazing about, lying there on the sofa like a bloated beached whale (ring any bells does it? If it’s the doorbell you are probably too lazy to answer it by now). And that’s not all at all. No. Not at all. There is more. The Big bonus is that the 100KM Challenge is FREE. It’s absolutely FREE. Are you ready for the big reveal? Ready to participate? Are you sure now?

Congratulations. YOU have Won the Prize. Yes YOU. Congratulations. Congratulations. Congratulations. Now slip into a tracksuit, switch off the TV,  put on your trainers and proceed toward your front door. Yes, your front door. Are we behind it, waiting for you? Are you getting excited that we might have infiltrated your home, your personal space, and been snooping about?  Maybe there are hidden cameras? Maybe it’s Ant and Dec coming????? Crikey. This is getting exciting. Now open your front door, slowly. Anybody there? Nobody there. Take a step outside and look around. Still nobody there? The anticipation is cranking up.

Adventures in Ireland.
Get your eyes off the cake.......

Now start walking down the road porky. And count your steps as you go. Keep walking until you have done 120 steps. No more. No less. 120 steps. Don’t turn around. Don’t look for cameras. Do look for cars, and those pesky cyclists. 120? Great. Now remember that spot. Return to your front door.

FREE Adventure. Adventure Ireland.
Eyes OFF - Get out to f#@K

Great Stuff. Once you return to your door do not squeeze through it and head to the fridge.  You must return to the marked spot 120 paces away, only 499 more times. Then, at that point, you will have completed the 100KM Walk.  (Consult a Doctor before you undertake this challenge, you big *jiggly-arsed yoke).

*If you think that you are a jiggly-arsed yoke then this article was not intended for you. Please ignore, and head back to the sofa.

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Yiziv come here for the readin not the nosin
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Independent Fact Check

I, Jane Roweled-Doh, acting as an Impartial and Independent Fact Checker, and on the payroll of the Ballyboondock Guardian - A sworn mortal enemy of The Ballyeffin Beacon, label this tripe as Mostly Fake News, and 100% Fake News.

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you look Sensitive! Snowflake????

Offended Easily?